Mother hated masculine aggressiveness and would never approve of an aggressively masculine outfit. "Maybe a hobo," I answered, "or a clown or a leprec...aun."Pretty wimpy, I thought, but at least they were all males. If mother had her way she'd probably want me to be a princess!Mother smiled. "Those are all good," she said."Which will I be?" I asked, resigned to the fact that, as always, the choice would not be up to me."Let's make it a surprise," mother said. "Margie and I will decide. You'll. Yet I saw it! A shape! A huddled, dirty woman lay in the fetal position, her face hidden from me. What the hell was I to do? I bent down my face coming closer to the desk opening. She was shivering, perhaps in the damp morning air, or from fear. The woman only wore a thin summer dress and heels. What was she doing here?With a gentle hand I placed my palm upon her arm hoping I could calm her. Here was a human being, someone that had been tormented by the German occupation and by the Allied air. She'd hold it for a second and exhale it to her left, towards the window. My cock would spring up a little each time she took a drag, so I frequently shifted my seating position. I wish the ride lasted longer.As we ate, we talked for a bit. She was so happy that my relationship with Ashley went from bickering and fighting to being nice and cooperative towards each other. "If she only knew the reason why," I thought to myself. Hopefully she never does.There were times I had to catch myself not. I just had to look around the room at all of my lover’s smiling faces again. It helped; it made me feel as high as a kite once more. I pushed the bad thoughts and negative emotions to the pit of my stomach and buried them. Malachar was right; there would be time for guilt and grief later. That was the luxury of surviving. You could wallow in misery at your convenience. Now was the time to celebrate, so I let the victorious part of what I was feeling wash over me, swamping me with renewed.
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