Screw it! I didn’t want to bother cleaning our makeshift toilet; besides, we would later need to melt snow to replace our drinking water. I crawled ...o the entrance and climbed to my knees. An upset bride once asked a famous advice columnist, “My husband insists on urinating in our backyard. Why does he do that?”Her answer became the stuff of legend, “Because he can.”I shuffled forward and, plumbing in hand, I sprayed the dry, dusty ground of our cave with a monsoon of yellow rain. The first. Mulai velaiyaaga sexiyaaga irunthathu, kaambai kadithu suvaika aarambithen. Pinbu velaikaari pavadaiyaiyum kayati aval pundaiyai kanbithal.Pundai sexiyaaga irunthathu, aval kuthikul en iru viralai vitu aata arambithen, aunty haaaaaaaaa endru muarinaal. Sofavil paduthu kondu ennai poolai aval pundaiyil vida solinaal, aval kaalgalai virithu sunniyai pundaiyil iraki matter poda aarambithen. Sirithu neram ookum pozhuthu moodu thangamal en poolil vinthu vanthu vitathu.Kanjai pundaiyil iraki vitu 5. And maybe Jesse.“I promise that I won’t ever refuse anyone here sexually, as long as there’s no scat, puke, or anything truly sick involved like that. Especially DJ, though. I want to be her sex slave, with the understanding that I’m everyone’s slut and plaything and everyone has free use rights to me. So, honestly, is this acceptable? Can I be the family slut, guys? DJ, Fernando, Jesse, Joey, Jimmy, Matt, Steve, Gia, Stephanie? Pretty please! I want to be in this family ... as family. He’s a murderer.”“That’s news to me, Miz Soda. Do you have proof?”“Your Honor, he confessed at the hearing,” The irate Soda responded.“Miz Soda, that’s not my understanding. I have a transcript right here,” the judge held up a thick file.“But ... But ... But...”“Miz Soda,” Judge Holland interrupted. “Both a Grand Jury and a Coroner’s Inquest say otherwise. Further, you are no longer on the school board, and if you continue to so represent yourself, I will hold you in contempt. Sit!”“Mister.
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