By John W. Osborne Jr. - 30 July 2012After having been told my danglies (American: "dingle-berries") looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to t...ke the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly succesful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considerd myself a bit. The office had a deadbolt which required a key from BOTH sides to either lock or unlock it. It would serve as a nice holding cell for our unwanted guest until Police arrived. Still holding Jennifer's hand, I led her into the display room and turned on all the lights. I sat her on a stool behind the sales counter and dialed 911. The shop is only two blocks from the police station and the cops were there in less than two minutes. I let them in, handed the gun to the first cop through the door. I casually ran my hand along her legs. Harry and Vic were looking at us expectantly. Joan said she'd like to try one of the divans. She got up and stood in front of a soft table lamp, her brazen nudity in the open. She walked to the divan behind Vic and had to lean on him to get on it. Joan lay on her side holding her head up by her hand and bent elbow, sort of a Cleopatra or Mae West look. She was beautiful, looking like the head concubine in an Ottoman harem. Her silk dress draped elegantly. But it was true then, as true as this is." I was very calm. "What do you suggest Paul? I don't believe in revenge, but some one who acts like this needs to get what's coming to them." I could have sworn a look of anticipation came into his eyes. "You're absolutely right. And I know just how to do it." I listened to his suggestion and agreed. So three days later I met him at a suite in a well known hotel. He had already set up the video equipment to tape the two of us having sex together. "I.
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